06 April 2009

a letter of complaint to the state of wyoming and the creators of the computer game "oregon trail" re:Independence Rock

let me start off by saying, i went out of my way to see you. i could have stuck to the interstate, but visions of my childhood beckoned me to something i had once only known in pixelated version. i read the words "independence rock" on the map and instantly i recognized it-- midway between start and finish, do you want to ford the river, all members of your party have died except you, you ANNA ROCKS, you have made it to Independence Rock, Wyoming (which, also, i'm not sure was actually called Independence when people were passing it circa 1840).










well, for your information, I PASSED IT. because, when you're driving through the mountains, you don't generally notice big rocks as unusual unless there's a sign saying otherwise. which there wasn't. unless you count the sign that said "Rest Area"; however, it seems illogical that a monument so integral to our country's heritage should be overshadowed by public toilets and sleeping truckers. in your defense, i know you had signs, but only on one side of the highway, which doesn't help half of the people on the road.


i guess i should thank the parks dept of wyoming for creating such a nicely paved walkway to the stupid rock, directly through a cattle ranch. while it is novel to walk within charging distance of multiple full grown bulls, it is also unnerving. especially when you show up by yourself in the middle of a sunday. i'm just glad i brought my phone with me. you know, in case of a stampede.

also, here's another one of my favorite sidenotes:

because if you leave the gate open, then the cows will definitely try to climb it.


oh, wait. how could they? it's covered in snow and has smooth faces which appear insurmountable. and while i admit that i didn't walk around the entire big rock, i cannot understand how people climbed to the top to write there names on it. i specifically remember a little boy wearing a blue shirt on the game saying "I climbed to the top of the rock to carve my name..." And THAT'S ANOTHER THING, i only saw like 6 names on it, not hundreds of years worth.
also, you warned against vandalism. this seems hypocritical. it's okay for them to do it but not us? seriously.
finally, this is my last and only semi-serious issue: this is the gate i had to pass through


and my serious question is, do you have to be that skinny to enter? cause it's not like the rock's going to sink of you let some bigger people on it. if they can even get on it. not because they are big, but because the rock seems like it is un-climable. i dunno. think about it.

all in all, you should really let triple A know to warn people not to get their hopes up. the rock is neither pixelated nor is it surrounded by conestoga wagons. i would have liked to have known that prior to my trip.

sincerely, anna

31 March 2009

thank you officer guapo

so jarilyn and i ventured back into the states today to gather some supplies for a new project. a group is renovating the teen girls dorms, so we went to costco and home depot to buy floor laminate, paint, caulking supplies, knee pads, ceiling fans, and yeah, we may or may not have bought a 5 lb tub of cookie dough. maybe. anyway, we loaded down this 15 passenger van with A LOT of supplies and hoped to make it through the border back into mexico with no problem.

well, we did get stopped. and about four or five different men looked through the van, each asking "what is that?" and jare answers with a stock "glue for the floor. the wooden floor in the back." after being waved through a few checkpoints we found ourselves facing what we had hoped to avoid: we needed to play taxes on the stuff. i looked at jare and said "turn on the charm" and we proceded to act oblivious and pump up the gringa. the officer who finally took us over, whom i like to call officer guapo, explained the different amounts of things we were allowed to bring in and the amount of taxes to be paid. even though we had payed well over $2000 for the supplies, jare told him, "como, quinientos, mas o menos, seisientos?" (500, maybe 6?) guapo smiled and started writing us a form... $400 minus the amount we are allowed to bring in for free = $250 time 15%...about $40.
yey gringas!

29 March 2009

in a very large nutshell


since the last legitimate post i have been jack kerouac-ing all over the road with my sister. we started in san diego on a three day carnival cruise with my mother. it was the perfect amount of time and my only regret is that my mom had to take a red eye on sunday night to get home. but, it seems she rolled with the punches... the cruise was my first, and we found plenty of time to learn how to play roulette, win some money, lose some money, drink really strong mixed drinks with really cheap rum, win the "name that tune" contest, hottub it, and eat a lot a lot of food. lucky for us "crazy bonny" came out to play and so the trip was punctuated with sheer silliness. by the end of the three days bons had endeared herself to all of the housekeeping staff on our hallway as well as our dinner waiter jorge, who called bonny his "little champion". her particular favorite part of the cruise was when the waiters sang during dinner. she called this waiter time and compared it to an intoxicating substance which takes one to the pinnacle of happiness.

the sunday that we disembarked we drove back to newport, had dinner at alta and dropped the moms off at LAX and proceded to drive north. we hit bakersfield having to pee and stopped at a sonic, which turned into a long debacle involving one sonicblast, three young employees who were probably high, bonny saying "bakersfield is sketchy", one of the employees not remembering where the water faucet was (here's a hint, look to the soda fountain), and generally the weirdest fast food experience i've ever had. four hours and a melted sonicblast later, we were still an hour away from our destination of modesto, so bonny took the reigns and drove a full 25 mph over the speedlimit. we nestled our heads in a scratchy and janky travelodge and tried to sleep.

the next day i convinced bon to take me to sacramento so we could see something i have longed for- the sign that says "Ocean City, MD - 3073 mi". you can guess that we have one in OC that says the reverse. we found it, but anticlimactly the official large sign had been stolen by some frat boys and all we got was a regular mile marker. oh well, dream realized. we spent the afternoon in davis and then made our way to san francisco. bonny found a great deal on the hilton near union square, so we were sitting in the lap of travelocity luxury. for dinner we ate at the stinking rose (really, too many garlicy details), then lulled ourselves to sleep by watching mtv's taking the stage. i should add that the sleep came easy after a 5-pint pitcher of fat tire.

the next day we found ourselves riding for free on the trolley, holding photo shoots with some sea lions on a public set of docks, and eating the rest of our previous night's dinner before heading off to see sunshine cleaning. we settled the night with pisco sours at a bar called cantina. apparently pisco is a popular spirit of the city, which only made my heart beat stronger for it. the liquor, similar to brandy, is made from grapes not good enough to make wine; i drank it by the liter when i lived in santiago. while in country we were told that valparaiso, chile is the sister city of san fran (they call it pancho, the diminutive of francisco), so the alcoholic tie suits.

now i find myself in baja mexico playing with babies and loving every minute of it. i will post pictures soon so that you can empathize. my favorite is named andres. i want to take him home with me.

lovies,

26 March 2009

i'm on a boat

just in case you haven't seen this gem, i encourage you to take three minutes to enjoy andy sandberg, t-pain, and the rest of the lonely island crew who are really on their way up (in my opinion):
so you might understand that when i found myself on a 3 day cruise with my mom and sister i continued to sing "I'M ON A BOAT" over and over and over and over.....

15 March 2009

socal

i have partially dedicated my residential status to the area of southern california. i've been here for a few weeks with my sister, minus one day trip to see laura and kim in vegas. kim put $20 down on a roulette table and ended up playing for hours, as i stood and cheered her on like i was her girlfriend, and we befriended a couple from santa cruz and the dealer who was from armenia. kim declared "i don't even know how this works" and he handed her a printout with the odds and the payouts. she asked if he ever came to gamble when he's not working and he replied "sweetie, do you come to work on your days off?"
bonny is finishing her quarter in school so while she's been out her friends, which i guess are technically fully and officially my friends now have been entertaining me, and i've also been entertaining myself with the dvd player and a little thing called hulu.com.
this weekend we were lucky enough to catch bonny's best friend jarelyn in san diego. she currently lives in baja mexico working for an orphanage, but she spent the week in the usa helping her very pregnant friend. we drove down on friday and had dinner with her and bonny's bf david at filipi's pizza, aka the best pizza in san diego and they ain't lying.
after dinner i took jarelyn home and swung down to point loma to see my friends from ocean city, nate and kate. kate is in school at point loma nazarene university? or college and nate moved to sd two months ago from philadelphia. we piled in the car and headed downtown, and promptly dropped our movie plans in exchange for eating at hooters. lucky for all of us a certain matt rumsey just so happened to be in sd too at the end of his spring break, so he cruised by with his former roommates and we had ourselves a grand old time. afterwards we went home and stayed up until 3am talking about high school and drinking beers. or at least, i was drinking beers.
the next day kate and i went to the store and bought two of everything because she says they get her with the twofer deals, even though i explained that you can buy just one. we made breakfast sandwhiches and then walked around ocean beach. it was so great to see both of them and chat about old times. nate's bro noah was there, too, and it was nice to meet him.
i drove back on saturday afternoon to get my hair cut by tina and then she, layla, a few other friends and i went dancing in laguna beach. i had a great time, but am slightly embarrassed that i tried to tell a marine that he should handwrite a letter to barack obama to end the war on terror.
my mom is landing in orange county on my birthday which is a really nice present, and bons and i are also going to fabio from top chef's restaurant in LA. i reaaaaaally want him to sing happy birthday to me. i'm going to santa monica with friend-since-kindergarten maria mueller for st. patty's day, and there are many more travel plans in the mix. so HAPPY IRISH DAY! if i don't see you, which i probably won't.

besos,

13 March 2009

IN N OUT BURGER


WHY DO I ALWAYS GIVE UP BEEF FOR LENT? AND THEN COME TO CALIFORNIA???

10 March 2009

wait, they don't love you like a love you....maaaaaaaps, wait


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a little physical manifestation of the last month spent in the car (amongst other places)